Saturday, January 10, 2015

The Help

I am short tempered.

I lack patience.

I wish growing up I would have paid more attention to learning how to do things.

I have two young sons who love to "help".

This creates learning opportunities.

I know in my heart that letting them help is a chance to pass something on, to spend quality time together, build their self esteem, and make memories...etc.

However, I also know that:

I am controlling, have to have it my way, want to do things on my own, and without help.

I am at odds with myself.  I usually don't allow help and dismiss the offers with a distraction.  All the while knowing that I should be embracing the very thing I push away.

I am making an effort.

Letting the boys "help" me unload the dishwasher.  (I still struggle with them loading it)

Putting clothes in the washer/dryer.  Taking things out of the dryer. (the latter is the easiest for me)

Help sweeping and/or vacuuming. Drives me off the deep end...especially when everyone wants to "help" at the same time.  When I let the "I'm Do Its" win and let them take turns helping Mom clean, I tell myself this better pay off when they are older and I expect them to do it on their own. One at a time is manageable and I can usually manage a smile and enjoy teaching.

My oldest loves to scrub dishes and rinse.  Its not thorough but he likes the bubbles, water and mess.  I need to work on letting him help more before I load the dishwasher.  And allowing them to help me load...even if it isn't the ideal arrangement.

Both really want to help me cook.  But my youngest is the most insistent.  He will grab a chair and pull it over, take away my spoon and declare he is helping. Again I can handle one a time. In baking where they can take turn adding things I so with a one dish meal though while a baby is standing holding onto the back of my pants....well the temper is always close to flaring.

Baby steps. How do you practice patience and remember to enjoy the little moments? I try to remember how much I enjoyed getting to do something and help as a child. The pride of having my hand in making the meal.

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